


Take Me Home

by usopping



Series: Take Me Home [1]
Category: One Piece
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-19
Updated: 2015-01-19
Packaged: 2018-03-08 07:11:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,716
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3200186
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/usopping/pseuds/usopping
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Prompt: Imagine your OTP at a party. Person A ends up drunk, leading to Person B having to take them home and make sure that they don’t get themselves hurt along the way.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Take Me Home

Sanji had just finished buttoning up his coat with fingers clumsy from the alcohol when Nami sidled up to him in the foyer, an innocent smile on her face.

"Can you do me a big favour, Sanji- _kun_?" she asked.

"Anything for you, my dear!" Sanji replied happily. His thoughts immediately ran wild, imagining a lonesome Nami- _san_ wanting her Prince to stay the night and keep her company once all the other dawdling party-goers headed home. Surely the ladies would soon take their leave and Nami- _san_ would kick out Luffy and the _marimo_. Chopper had gone home half and hour ago, and -

"Are you listening to me, Sanji- _kun_?"

"Ah, sorry, Nami- _san,_ I was distracted by your beauty!" Sanji said, ginning sheepishly.

Nami rolled her eyes, not that Sanji noticed. "Can you take Usopp home? He lives near you, right? He's so drunk he can barely stand on his own, and if Belle-mère comes home and finds a guy here I'm in deep shit."

"Wh-What about Luffy or Zoro? Can't they do it?"

Nami gave him a look. "Do you honestly think either of them would get him home safely?"

Sanji sighed. She had a point. Luffy would probably end up dragging the long-nose all around town on a late-night adventure, and with the _marimo_ 's legendary sense of direction the chances that they'd get home before dawn were slim to none.

"Please, Sanji- _kun_? You're the only one who can do it!"

"Alright, I'll take him," Sanji conceded. "Where is he?"

"I saw him heading for the kitchen a few minutes ago. Thanks, Sanji- _kun_!" She gave him a quick hug and flounced back towards the living room.

Sanji reveled in the memory of her touch for several moments, the feeling of her slim arms around him, her soft chest pressed against his. Then he headed to the kitchen to find Usopp. When he entered the room, the long-nose was pouring vodka into a glass of what looked like cola mixed with something green-ish.

"What the hell are you doing, you idiot?!" Sanji exclaimed.

"Experimenting," Usopp declared, lifting the concoction to his lips.

"Oh, no you don't. We're going home," Sanji stated, taking the glass from him and dumping its contents down the drain.

Usopp stumbled and leaned against Sanji. "Going home? We are?"

"Yes, Yoda. Get your coat on."

"You're taking me home?" His eyelids drooped and he adopted an uncharacteristically sultry tone. "What are you gonna do to me?"

A blush flared across Sanji's face, and he hid his surprise with a scowl. "Stop acting like an idiot and let's go."

He dragged Usopp to the foyer and watched him struggle first with his laces and then with the zipper on his coat. Finally he gave up on the zipper, wrapped his scarf around his neck, pulled on his hat, and stumbled out into the winter night. Sanji followed him carefully, fully aware that he wasn't exactly sober himself. He lit a cigarette before he'd even stepped off Nami's porch. Several paces ahead, Usopp slipped on a patch of ice and fell into a snowbank. With an annoyed sigh, Sanji hurried over and pulled him to his feet. Instead of standing on his own, Usopp slung an arm around Sanji's neck and leaned on him for support once more.

"You're a good guy, Sanji," the black-haired boy slurred.

"Yeah, yeah."

"No, seriously. You're a really great person. Even if you are a pervert."

"Gee, thanks."

"Well, it's true! You're always flailing around and flirting with girls and you don't even notice that Nami likes someone else!" He gasped. "Oh! I shouldn't have said that!"

"What do you mean?" Sanji asked, his interest suddenly piqued. "Who is it? No way is she interested in Luffy. Don't tell me it's Zoro! Or _you_!"

"Oi, what's that supposed to mean? Never mind. God, you sure are dumb, Sanji." Usopp leaned secretively closer to the blond. "She obviously has a thing for Vivi. Why else was she trying to get everyone else out of the house? Haven't we all stayed over before?"

"Yeah, when Belle-mère's been out of town! Nami- _san_ said she's coming home tomorrow morning!" Even as he said it, he knew that wasn't exactly what the redhead had said.

"The calendar in the kitchen said otherwise." Usopp grinned and waggled his eyebrows.

"Y-You're wrong," Sanji said feebly, his heart sinking. Nami wanted Vivi? She ... liked girls? Did that mean Sanji never even had a chance?! No, he couldn't accept that. Usopp was drunk, he was just talking nonsense, making shit up. He was always making shit up. It was true that Nami had been really close, almost touchy-feely with Vivi all night, but wasn't that normal for girls who were friends?

Usopp dropped his head heavily onto Sanji's shoulder and mumbled, "You're so busy chasing after her that you don't even notice when someone does like you. Not that you'd be interested anyway, but not even noticing...!"

Sanji squirmed under the other boy's weight. "What are you talking about now?"

"Nothing, never mind."

They continued in silence, Sanji having to be careful enough for both of them. The going was slow, and several times they both almost fell. The longer they walked, the more heavily Usopp leaned on Sanji, and soon they were inching along, Usopp dragging his feet, and Sanji practically pulling him along.

"Walk properly or I'll leave you in a snowbank," the blond grumbled.

"No you won't," Usopp yawned. "You're too nice. And we're almost at my place."

Sanji grunted. He was right, of course. Minutes later they had made it to Usopp's door. He fumbled in his pockets for his keys, and after missing the lock three times, Sanji snatched them from his hands and unlocked the door. For a moment, they simply stood in the doorway. When it became apparent that Usopp wasn't going to be walking in himself, Sanji sighed yet again and grumbled, "Come on, let's go."

In the hallway, the blond groped for a light switch with one hand and tried to dump the long-nose into a chair with the other, but he held on, bringing up his other arm to embrace him awkwardly.

"Stay over," he said.

Sanji froze and blinked in the darkness. Had he misheard? "Um ... what'd you say?"

"Stay over," Usopp repeated. "It's late and it's cold and my mom's out of town, too, so stay over."

"My house is right down the street."

"Sanjiiii!"

"Get off of me, you dork!" Sanji grabbed him by the wrists and pried him off, pushing him away.

Usopp staggered backwards and promptly tripped over ... something. Sanji finally found the light switch and lit up the hall. Lying on his back with his arms and legs sprawled, Usopp groaned, "It's no use, I can't move. You'll have to carry me to my room."

"Stop being an idiot. Do you expect me to undress you?"

"I wouldn't mind."

"You're even drunker than I thought."

"If I take off my shoes and coat and stuff will you carry me the rest of the way?"

"Hell no! I'm going home!"

"Pleeeease?"

Sanji glared down at the other. "I'll help you up there, that's it. Then I'm leaving."

Usopp pouted, but gave in. He left his outdoor clothing in a pile on the vent and promptly collapsed against Sanji, who had shed only his boots, all over again. Climbing the stairs proved even more treacherous than walking through the ice and snow. Halfway up, Usopp slipped on the hardwood surface and Sanji only just prevented them both from falling and probably breaking their necks. Luckily a thick carpet ran along the upstairs hall, making the last leg of the journey easier. In Usopp's room, Sanji didn't bother turning on the light. In all the years he had known Usopp, the long-nose hadn't once reorganized his room, except when he'd switched out his kiddie bed for a regular one. Vaguely, Sanji noticed his head was throbbing in that vague, almost painless way it did when he'd had too much to drink. The darkness made him less surefooted, and as he tried to dump his drunk friend into the bed, hands grabbed his jacket by the lapels and pulled him in right along with him.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?!" the blond exclaimed as he landed half on top of the other and promptly rolled off - albeit towards the wall rather than the door.

"Just stay the night," Usopp whined, throwing his arm across Sanji's side and just kind of leaving it there.

Sanji thought about arguing, but now that he had a bed under him he realized the extent of his fatigue. He had been at work the first half of the day and had arrived at Nami's early to whip up a few pizzas for everyone to eat during the party (and the obligatory chunk of meat to keep Luffy satisfied). Then there was the party itself and the goddamn quest of getting Usopp home. His feet and arms and back ached, his eyelids weighed a hundred pounds, and for all intents and purposes his limbs simply did not want to move anymore. Surely it wouldn't be so terrible to sleep here for the night. They had known each other for so long, they were almost like brothers. He exhaled loudly and said, "Fine, but in the morning we're gonna have a serious goddamn talk."

"Yeah, yeah," Usopp mumbled, already half-asleep.

Using the last of his energy, Sanji wiggled out of his coat and tossed it to the floor, then pulled the blanket over them both. The bed really wasn't made for two people, especially not two relatively lanky teenage boys, but after a bit of maneuvering they figured out a way to fit. They were practically spooning, and Usopp's hair was in Sanji's face, but he didn't want to think about the former, and it turned out the latter wasn't exactly unpleasant. His hair was soft and smelled like grapefruit (with a touch of booze, but Sanji knew they both reeked of that). Without really even thinking about, Sanji put his arm around Usopp's waist. He was asleep almost quick enough to miss Usopp taking his hand and twining their fingers together.

Almost.


End file.
